Episode Transcript
Qin En [00:00]
Hi, I am Qin En, and this is the Parents in Tech podcast.
This month, we have a special collaboration series with Sleek, a one-stop shop for entrepreneurs to start and grow their businesses in Australia, Hong Kong, Singapore, and the UK. I speak to four parents in Sleek to find out how they create work-life integration and balance their career ambitions with family aspirations. In this episode, I speak with BanWei, Deputy CTO at Sleek. BanWei is a parent to a boy and a girl, aged nine and seven.
Hey, BanWei, welcome to the Parents in Tech show. To begin with, could you tell us a bit more about your family?
BanWei [00:54]
Okay. Thanks for having me today, Qin En. Yeah. My wife and I have two young kids (Yuen Yi and Yuan Xi). (Yuan Xi), today, I think he's nine years old, and then (Yuen Yi) seven years old now.
Qin En [01:06]
Wonderful.
BanWei [01:07]
Three and P1, Yeah.
Qin En [01:08]
Okay. Got it. Got it. So, yeah, the age where they're learning a lot, absorbing a lot in the world. We'll get to your family a bit more, in a short while, but first, could you also introduce what you do at work.
BanWei [01:21]
I'm currently the Deputy CTO for Sleek.
Qin En [01:24]
Right.
BanWei [01:24]
Throughout my career, I've been in technology. I started as a developer myself, and then slowly became a senior and then manager. And yes, now I'm the Deputy CTO in Sleek.
Qin En [01:37]
Very exciting. So, I wanna bring you back to, say, almost a decade ago where you first welcomed your first child into the world. Where were you in your career at that point in time?
BanWei [01:51]
At the point of time, I was in MMC, a multinational company that is from US.
Qin En [01:56]
Yep.
BanWei [01:57]
So, at the point of time, I actually did quite many project across Asia path, including China, Taiwan Malaysia Australia. Yeah, I traveling quite often.
Qin En [02:08]
Nice.
BanWei [02:09]
At the part time, before I having my first child.
Qin En [02:11]
Right.
BanWei [02:12]
Yeah. I think when we happens to know that we, my, my wife is pregnant with my first child, I think I started to think of what do I do next?
Qin En [02:20]
Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And you mentioned you were travelling around quite a bit, right? So, how did that impact things? Did you have to move your travel schedule around or, yeah, like, what was the situation like?
BanWei [02:32]
At the part time, my child hasn't been born yet, so it's still fine for me to fly around. Right? And that, at that part time, actually, I kind of focused on my career.
Qin En [02:43]
Makes sense.
BanWei [02:43]
Right? I wanted to do more different projects and different implementations to gain my experience. And, I am actually quite happy at the time that I have a chance to work with different, many different developers all around the world. So, I did actually have a chance to like to fly around and look around the world. I mean, when I was still young.
Qin En [03:07]
Nice, nice, nice. So, that was probably when you were still building up your career and then first child, second child. Now, tell me a bit more about the differences.What is it like to be a parent to one child versus a parent to two children?
BanWei [03:21]
Okay. For one child, I think it is kind of like a honeymoon, because my wife and I think two others are taking care of a single, one child at the moment. I think at the moment, I think it is still manageable.
Qin En [03:33]
Okay.
BanWei [03:33]
Right? And, we enjoy that pretty much, right? And, of course when our first child grows, maybe near to one year plus, right. We started to think that he can't be alone. We don't want him to be a single child.
Qin En [03:47]
Right.
BanWei [03:47]
So, it's kind of like, we wanted him to have a play, kind of playmate or siblings playing around when they grew up together. So we actually decided that let's try for the second one. After we have the second one and things change, I mean in terms of our time and also our, how do we manage them.
Qin En [04:08]
Yeah.
BanWei [04:08]
Right. It's definitely quite different in a way that there are a lot more in terms of managing two children versus one child.
Qin En [04:15]
Got it. Got it. And, it is just like parenting responsibilities between you and your wife, who plays what role at home?
BanWei [04:23]
We don't really have a very clear cut on who plays what roles, it is really whoever is actually capable of doing certain things. I think then that person will kind of like, just go ahead and do it. Yeah, for example, I prefer I will be, I know some cooking, right? So, I will be cooking for most of them when they're babies, right? Yeah. I will do the cooking for them. You know, when babies are still young you can't bring them out for food.
Qin En [04:54]
Oh, that's incredible. Okay. I wanna double click a bit on that cooking. Where did you pick this up from? How did you know, how did you discover this, right? It's great that you have that, it's great that you also, it comes useful for your family, but, yeah. Tell me a bit more about the backstory of you and cooking.
BanWei [05:12]
I think I started as a young child. I like to eat, I love good food.
Qin En [05:16]
As to all of us. But no, I don't like to cook.
BanWei [05:22]
And I do have an interest to, I mean, follow my moms when I was young that learned a bit of cooking from her basic one. And, when I graduated from my secondary school before I went into the university, I actually happened to work in a restaurant, in particular, a Taiwanese restaurant, and the coworkers were very friendly, including the chef or the cook during that time. She's very open in terms of teaching us small little tricks or skills for cooking. And, that's where I started a bit more in terms of cooking.
Qin En [05:55]
Yeah.
BanWei [05:56]
Yeah.
Qin En [05:56]
Okay. You really piqued my interest. What is perhaps one interesting thing that you picked up from that experience or was a secret ingredient, secret sauce, secret technique that maybe not that many people know about?
BanWei [06:09]
I think it will be the use of ingredients. Right? And the chef, during the time that she shared with me that if you want to have good food that tastes good, right? The ingredients are actually very important. So, for my case, I actually try to go to the market to get the freshest food on the market, wet market itself, as much as possible. Right, I try not to go too much too often to the supermarket. Yeah, so yeah, I think that's where I get,
Qin En [06:36]
Now, you make me feel guilty. I always just go to the NTUC and just pick up whatever thing there. When do you go to the wet market, right? Cause I presume that does involve waking up pretty early in the morning and all? Yeah, like what does your schedule look like around that?
BanWei [06:50]
Actually, I started this when literally my first child was born. I follow. At the point of time is the nanny that is taking care of my babies, right? So I follow her in the early morning at seven plus eight, right. To go into the wet market, to learn from her what kind of ingredients is best for the babies, and then learn a bit of how she deals with the stores owners in the market. So, yes nowadays I usually go to the market in the early morning, like seven plus eight.
Qin En [07:20]
Wow. Okay.
BanWei [07:21]
During the weekends. Yep.
Qin En [07:22]
Nice, nice, nice. It does definitely seem like you're someone who is very curious, loves to absorb and learn all this information. So perhaps, moving away from cooking, what is one area of parenting that you have been curious about recently? And where is your sources for information and knowledge?
BanWei [07:41]
Actually for parenting, I think most of my friends are around the same age to have big children. Right, so sometimes we do share information. So that is one source of my information. And also we often gather together. I mean, just for them to have some playdates for my children as well, right?
Qin En [08:02]
Got it. Got it. Got it. Cool. Now let's move to, to one of the more interesting topics or so that I noticed in preparation for this right up. One month before the birth of your first child, you flew to the US to receive a presidential award. That sounds incredible. First, tell us a bit more about what that award is and then what was the work about also?
BanWei [08:25]
Okay, during my time in my previous company I think they were called Gtech at the, during that time. And the highest so-called award within the company is the presidential award. And actually will give you the tickets back and forth to our headquarter in Rhode Island in the US to receive the presidential award.
So what we did is actually we did a project for Malaysia and in the usual time of the project cycle, it usually will take more than six months. Right, but because of the urgency of customer requests, We kind of be a bit more innovative in a way that how we do things, especially in terms of requirements gathering, implementation plan and also [Goli] go life preparations.
So we managed to get it done within three months and actually the shortening of three months reflects a lot in terms of how we manage the customer and customer expectation also how do they actually, in terms of profit, right? We, they are, they go live much faster in terms of three months earlier. And then the profit that they gain over the three months is actually, quite remarkable to them.
Qin En [09:42]
Wow. Okay. So it really sounds like it's a combination of that resourcefulness, that relentlessness and your creativity that led to that outcome. So I'm gonna ask how you have applied that to troubleshoots in better commerce.
Challenges that have come up at home, right? I'm sure as both your children are growing up, there's a fair share of parenting challenges. Maybe share one, what one of those challenges are and how you've adapted the same principles and values towards addressing them.
BanWei [10:10]
I think the challenges for being a parent are always, how do you actually set yourself as a role model for them? I mean, before we actually have our children, I think we are kind of free and easy. And once we actually try to bring them once they're born, right? We're trying to set an example for them. I think it is because we believe children always learn from their parents. So, for example, like waking up early, going into the wet market is a thing that, I mean, you show it to your children.
Same thing they have to wake up early now six plus to go to school and yeah. I think right now we are lucky enough that they treat it as a routine that's a responsibility for them to do. I know there are some children that are unable to wake up in the early morning to go to school or make a lot of noise.
But so far I think both of my kids they're quite good at that. I've been, they're quiet, they will not make any noise waking up early to go to the school.
Qin En [11:13]
Well, my daughter hasn't got to school, but I do anticipate that there will be quite a challenge when it comes. So definitely can pick up one or two tips from you on.
So, okay. Moving back to your current role, right? Anyway, now as deputy CTO at Sleek, you know, in a startup, things move fast. There's a lot more responsibility. There's a lot more ownership, but tell me a bit more about work life balance and what that means, what that looks like for you.
BanWei [11:43]
Yeah. Yes, it’s definitely a lot more responsibility. And the team that I manage now is much bigger than my previous company.
Qin En [11:51]
Right.
BanWei [11:52]
And luckily Sleek, actually, they kind of promote work life balance including allowing remote working from home. So that's where I can actually manage my time with them pretty well. For example, I can actually fetch them, I can bring them to school in the early morning. And when I come back I still have time. (I) don't have to rush to work in the early morning. And in the afternoon, I can have like 15 minutes break to pick them up from school. I mean, it is flexible, right? Whenever I don't have, I don't have a meeting, I actually can go over and pick them back up.
Qin En [12:26]
I think that's definitely something that's very special, right? And something that's very beneficial to have that flexibility and control over your schedule. But I think that also sometimes means that working from home, at least what I found it's a bit hard to draw boundaries, right? Like you know, at work, once you leave work, you generally put stuff aside. Do you face any of those challenges and how do you make sure that your personal time and your family time is protected?
BanWei [12:52]
For me, I always put my family first, whenever they need something. I will be able to try to make it for them. And of course, when they are settled down, let's say they are doing their homework or they're having their TV times, right? Then I will jump on to check, are there any emails or are there any urgent things that I need to be doing to solve it quickly.
And of course, I do have a timed schedule. For example, in the afternoon, I always will try to make sure I have this at least 30 minutes to go and pick them up from school and then come back to them and then maybe have some 10 to 15 minutes time with them by asking them how's the day in the school and is there any, do they have any homework to do kind of thing?
Qin En [13:36]
Got it. I think it's nice, right? That you are, your priorities are clear. You kind of set those time assigned. And even though it's not like huge amounts of time, I think it's definitely, it sounds like it's frequentand it's consistent.
And I think that's truly what's valuable. Next question also for my benefit, but as someone who has gone through the parenting process for nearly a decade, you kinda walk through the different phases your children go through. And also, you know, how you as a parent have grown in a recent decade.
BanWei [14:07]
I think there's a very clear distinction when your child is about to enter primary school. If you happen to attend one of the parent sessions, I think they classify children into three phases, six, 12, and the 18th. Right? So one to six is actually, they are very close to you. They attach to you almost for everything and from primary one onwards, seven onwards they are actually trying to do a lot more things by themselves. They learn a lot of things from different sources, especially school.
Qin En [14:43]
Right.
BanWei [14:43]
So that's the time certain things as parents, I think you have to let it go, or let them grow to be able to have their own (way of) thinking. And that's where the challenge comes from, where I also, I mean, my wife and I also started to think, how do we want to shift their character going forward, right? And also how to actually put them in a good condition or good direction that we want them to be. And for the third one, we haven't reached us yet so,
Qin En [15:15]
So ask you maybe in future. Okay. I think that's very interesting, right? So let's talk a bit about I guess, values and discipline. What does that look like for you right now with your family? Especially, maybe let's talk about the discipline part, right? Because of course, young children, they're always things that they want to do mischief that they're up to. So I'd love to hear a bit more about what yours and your wife's approach towards that.
BanWei [15:38]
I think the key bottom for discipline is we must mean it when we say it to our children, right. For example, I always tell them that if you did something and I'm going to punish you, or I'm going to stop you from having TV day for whatever reason. Yeah, so I always try to keep my words for that. Even though my younger one is a daughter, she will literally cry. And I make a lot of noise, but I will still like, make sure I stand what I said earlier, right. So I think that creates a very clear message to them that you have to, there is a boundary that they have to follow.
Qin En [16:18]
Yes. Right.
BanWei [16:19]
They cannot cross a boundary.
Qin En [16:20]
Correct.
BanWei [16:21]
Of course, as a parent, I think we do know that sometimes children do wrong things, right?
Qin En [16:27]
Yup.
BanWei [16:27]
Then we need to judge or gauge across that, how to send a message to them that, okay, this is okay, but please don't do it next time. Right, so for this time, I'm going to do this to you, or how do you actually be able to avoid it or doing the same wrong thing again? Right, so that they don't repeat that in the future again.
Qin En [16:49]
Yeah, that's so true right? I think being able to draw those clear lines and also establish some form of consistency, I feel like that's so important, right? So that they know you're not what your words must be taken seriously is not something easily that they can try over. So I guess also on that note, one way will be left here in terms of how being a parent has helped you become a better leader or vice versa.
BanWei [17:15]
Okay. Actually, being a parent, I mean, looking at my child, my children I think one thing I have to learn from them is the passion for learning, right? Because if you look at the children, they are always very curious about everything. I mean, they are open to everything. So similarly I think for a leader, I think instead of having, I mean, we did learn a lot of knowledge, technical or non- technical over time, right.
But I think the passion for learning it, I think I have to upkeep that maybe I should treat myself as a child again, that I'm looking forward to learn new things and also trying to think I think in the way that the new ideas or there's no boundary when it comes to new idea and try to innovate for new solutions, yup.
Qin En [18:03]
Yeah, I think it's that insatiable curiosity, like, yeah, like a sponge, right when they're so young. And I think sometimes just asking why things work this way, this idea of challenging the status quo while frustrating at times, I'm also sure it becomes motivation and reminders for us not to, not to do the same. Yeah, very interesting. So I guess, you know, as your children are going through phase two, as you were sharing earlier, what are maybe some of the hopes and dreams that you have for them for this particular phase?
Right? Let's take it step by step, don't need to, yeah. Otherwise it might be too grandiose but yeah, just for this phase, up to the point where let's say they complete their schooling before they go to university, have you thought about what does, yeah, what are some of the things you hope for them?
BanWei [18:48]
To me, frankly, I don't really have too much hope in terms of, I think educational results or whatever. I do really hope that they are happy in their childhood at this period of time. Because if I recall back to my childhood, I think that's the most happy moment in my life. Right, so I want them to enjoy the time that they have during this period.
And of course they learn too. I mean having the education in school and learn how to tackle exams, right? That's part of the growth that they, I mean, part of the phase they have to go through within this period of time, but I try not to like, to stress out them that okay like you have to, I mean score certain kinds of results in school, right? And other than that, I am also trying to give them as much exposure as possible, right? Including music lessons, like some of the sports, right. And yeah, my son actually enrolled in Wushu. That he actually, we let them pick himself.
We, I mean, in P3, you get to choose your CCA. We kind of give them the freedom for him to choose by himself, whatever he wants.
Qin En [20:01]
I really like that. It's nurturing that idea that you are enabling your children to pursue whatever they want, and you're just there to support them. Really nice.
This has been a really interesting conversation, BanWei. To sort of wrap up our time today, if there's one piece of advice you have for parents in tech, what would it be?
BanWei [20:21]
I think that advice is to expect the unexpected. This is very similar when you deal with the children and also come with tech, right? The unexpected events will happen, I think. So if you have the mental preparations, I think and you have a team that supports you at work, of course at home, I have my wife supporting me.
Qin En [20:42]
Yeah.
BanWei [20:43]
Right. So I think it can be resolved and don't put yourself into too much stress.
Qin En [20:50]
Yeah.
BanWei [20:51]
Or, or.
Qin En [20:53]
Makes sense. So, you know, really just take things as it goes. And also, yeah, let's, don't worry about the small things. Really cool, well, BanWei, thank you so much for joining me on the show today. If some of the parents would like to get in touch with you, how can they best do so?
BanWei [21:09]
They can go to my LinkedIn profile.
Qin En [21:12]
Okay, sounds good. We will include your LinkedIn profile in the shownotes. Once again, I really appreciate you taking time off to join us. Thank you so much, BanWei.
BanWei [21:19]
Thanks. Thanks, Qin En.
Qin En [21:25]
Thanks for listening to the Parents In Tech podcast. With me, your host, Qin En.
We hope you were inspired how to raise kids and build companies. To catch up on earlier episodes or stay updated with upcoming ones, head over to www.parents.fm to join our community of Parents In Tech. There, you can also drop me a question, idea, feedback or suggestion. Once again, the website it's www.parents.fm.
That's all for this episode, folks. See you next time.
